High On Sugar
by edwardsbella99
Summary: Bella, cake, big bag of sugar. Dun dun dun! Read and Review! Disclaimer: I do not own anything in this story...
1. High On Sugar

**Funny story about when Bella eats too much cake ( Not a vampire yet )**

**Review Please!!**

I walked to the refrigerator, and surely, there was some cake that Charlie left over.

He had gone to a wedding...and I asked for cake.

And I was happy that I got some!

And Edward was coming over in ten minutes!

Yay!

I quickly stuffed all the cake in my mouth, and washed it down with a glass of milk.

I probably made a new world record for Stuffing Cake in Your Mouth Really Fast.

All of a sudden, I just paused.

And...

OOOOHHH!OH!OOOOOOO!

I felt crazy!!

I started jumping and running. Hopping and skipping. Yelling and giggling.

Sugar!

I needed sugar!

I need more! More! MORE!

I took out a cup, and dug it into our sugar bag.

I started digging into my sugar.

SUGAR!

I need MORE!

Running to the fridge, I slipped and fell, but I was like, PSH! Whatever, dudes!

I grabbed the two liter bottle of mountain dew and gulped it down.

Ohhhhh, dudes!

Dudes, dudes, dudes, oh!

MOUNTAIN DEW!

I need more sugar!!

I ran back to the sugar bag and put some more into my cup. I then ran and put coke in that cup. Drinking it was the best part.

Man, did I get hyper!!

"Holy macaroni!! Hahahahahahahahahaha!!" I yelled and laughed to myself.

Charlie was at work, so I was all alone...for now.

Edward came through the door.

"Bella? Are you alright? Alice told me she had a vision of you slipping..."

"Zip-id-dee-doo-da!! Ooo! Edward! Eddie spaghetti! Hahahahhahaa!"

He raised his eyebrows.

"Did Alice or Emmett set you up to act crazy, love?"

"No, you silly spaghetti!!" I laughed like a maniac...again.

He blinked a few times, before jumping into his arms.

My legs wrapped around his waist and my arms, around his neck.

I laughed again, and messed up his hair.

"Ooey, gooey! Eddie spaghetti uses jelly! Ughy buggy! Who wants jelly on spaghetti!?" I laughed again.

"Um, Bella, are you sick?"

"Nope, you dope! HA! THAT RHYMES!"

He ran me upstairs, and sat me down on my bed.

I just laughed until tears came out of my eyes, and I almost fell off of my bed.

Edward caught me.

"Eddie! I almost fewll! Kiss my boo-boo!" I acted like a baby and started laughing my head off.

"Oh, what a night this will be." he muttered.

"Don't be grumpy you lumpy spaghetti! HAHHAAHAA!"

He squeezed his eyes shut.

It looked like he had a headache.

Can vampires have headaches?

"Bella? What exactly did you eat tonight?"

"Uhhhhhhhhh!" I laughed again.

He grabbed my shoulders.

"BELLA!" he yelled.

"Yes, spaghetti?" I giggled.

He put his hand on my forehead.

"Tell me what you ate, please!" he almost begged.

"Hehehe! I ate-hahaha!- c--c--cAHAHAHAHAA!"

"Cahahaha? Cake? Was it cake, love?"

"Maybe, baby!"

"Anything else?"

"Yope!"

"Yes? Or nope?"

"Yope!" I repeated.

"Ugh!"

"Hehehe!! Cake, sugar, and mountain dew! Ooo! And coke!"

He suddenly looked serious and mad.

"Bella? Do you mean cocaine?"

I laughed like a psycho.

"Bella! This is serious! Sit here!"

I started holding my hurting sides, but kept laughing.

He came back, chuckling.

"Ah, love. I think you're high on sugar."

"I sure am, Mr. Spaghetti Head!"

He looked at me, like he was going to duct tape my mouth, but instead, he just held me against his chest while I laughed the rest of the night.

**Review if you like...or if you don't! lolxD**


	2. Drunk From Chocolate

**Alrighty. I can NEVER make my one-shots, one-shots. LolxD So, here's another chapter...but this time...she's not high on sugar...**

I woke up in Edward's arms...with a big headache.

"Edward." I moaned.

"Love...are you still...high...no offense, of course."

I gave a sleepy smile.

"Obviously not, Edward. But I have a huge headache. Can I have your hand?"

I opened my eyes, trying to find him.

"No you may not."

I began to whimper, but he said something.

"You may have me."

I smiled.

He held me tight against his chest, and my headache began to disappear.

"Mmm." I sighed.

"So, is that my new nickname?"

I was confused.

"Huh?"

He chuckled.

"Eddie...spaghetti?"

My eyes got wide.

Did I call him that?!

Wasn't that a doll?

Oh gosh.

"Edward! I am soooo sorry!"

He chuckled again.

"It's alright. The sugar took over...I suppose."

I blushed.

"Ah, love, it's alright. No sugar next time. Agreed?"

I smiled.

"Yeah. How terrible was it?" I asked...not sure if I really wanted to know the answer.

"Um..."

Uh oh.

It was so terrible, Edward didn't want to say it.

"Please, Edward. Tell me."

He sighed.

"Well it started with Eddie Spaghetti...with jelly...um, and then, psycho laughter, and you couldn't say cake."

"Oh, wow."

"Yes, but it's fine, love."

"I'm sorry." I murmured into his chest.

"Hush, my only love, hush." he said while playing with my hair.

I inhaled his scent.

He pulled away.

I put on a puppy dog face.

He laughed loudly.

"Oh, Bella. If I didn't have to go hunting, I would stay with you in my arms for eternity."

I looked down as I spoke.

"That will happen soon."

He kissed my hair.

"Yes, it will. I made my promise, as did you." he sighed.

"Yes." I agreed.

"Goodbye, love. I love you with all of my heart."

I blushed and smiled.

"I love you, too."

He pulled me into a hug, and ran his nose up my neck.

I shivered from the touch, and his nose ran up to my chin.

It reached my nose, and he gave me a soft, yet passionate kiss.

He pulled away, and me being me, I was gasping.

He smiled.

"Goodbye." he repeated.

"Bye." I managed.

He chuckled at the edge of my window.

"Come by my house at three, please." he told me.

I nodded.

"Have fun!" The quote I had said the first time I knew he had to hunt.

"And you be careful."

I nodded again, and he was out of my room.

I sighed after two seconds.

Edward had become my new obsession.

Other than this saga I was reading.

The twilight saga.

It was actually good.

Though, it was some ridiculous fiction. **( LolxD I had to add that! )**

I decided to take a shower and eat some breakfast.

Charlie had gone out fishing long before I woke up.

So I scrubbed my hair with my favorite strawberry shampoo, and everything else.

I did them as slowly as possible.

I thought time may pass by quicker and I would be with Edward soon.

It didn't.

My shower actually lasted about ten minutes.

I got some corn pops, and ate them.

That took five minutes, so I decided to have something sweeter.

I looked in the cabinets, and there were coco puffs.

I ate those in two minutes, and poured myself some more.

"Mmmm!" I said aloud.

I hadn't had chocolate in so long!

Before I knew it, all of the coco puffs were gone, and I was sad.

I started crying.

So I ran out to my truck and drove to the closest store.

Acme.

Perfect.

I ran in, and bought as much chocolate as I could.

Chocolate cereals, chocolate milk, waffles, pancakes, chips, and plain chocolate candies.

Ohhhh! This day had just became better.

As I drove home, I kept looking at the bag of chocolate goodness.

_Don't do it Bella! Wait until you get home! Don't look like an idiot scarffing her mouth!_ I thought.

And then something in me exploded.

I pulled over and went into the back seat and began kissing my candies.

I did begin scarffing my mouth, and moaned.

It tasted soooo good!

No!

Great!

"It's alright, baby. I'm saving you for last." I said to my mega candy bar.

After everything, I finally ate my baby.

After finished, I lay on my back.

"Yuuuummm!" I moaned again.

After a few minutes, I sat up, and got dizzy, but crawled into the front seat, beeping the horn a few times by accident.

I looked at the clock, and it was almost three.

"Yippee!" I hiccuped.

I started singing along to _Sexy Back_ by Justin Timberlake.

I arrived at the Cullens' Residence and climbed out of my truck, falling on the pavement.

Edward picked me up before I fell, and I laughed loudly, throwing my head back.

"Oh my, Bella? Have you had more sugar?"

I started crying.

"You hate me!" I cried, running out of his arms and into the house.

I ran right into Emmett.

"So how are you and Eddie Spaghetti?" He laughed his booming laugh.

I laughed along with him.

"I am sooo ugly and old!" I started crying again.

"And how was your 'little snuggle' with your candies?" He used quote marks around "little snuggle".

Alice.

I stood up, but stubbed my toe.

"SHIT!"

Emmett's eyes got large, and laughed, unstoppable.

Edward came rushing in.

Apperently, he was in shock.

I started crying from the pain, and sat down.

He sat with me.

"Bella...what did you eat this time?"

"Uh..."

He wiped away my tears with his thumb.

I started laughing.

"What?" he asked.

"THAT TICKLED!!" I laughed, and started kicking him.

"Bella...please. Sit up, and stop kicking. You'll only give yourself a bruise. Tell me what you ate."

"Ch-ch-chocolates!" I started crying again.

"Ah, Bella, sweetie?"

"Yes?" I sniffed.

"You're officially drunk from chocolate."

Only me.

**If you review, I'll put up some more chapters if you'd like...**


	3. Emo From Eating Steak

**I'm sorry I havn't been updating. Truly, I am. Enjoy and review!**

"Edward?" I whispered after it being an hour that I was in his arms.

We were just lying across the floor, and I loved it.

He held me protectivly against his chest, stroking my hair sometimes.

I didn't know I could sit still for that long.

Well, I suppose it's possible, since Edward was with me.

"Yes, Bella?"

"Could I have some steak?"

He sat up.

"Steak?" he repeated.

I nodded.

"After chocolate? And being drunk, love?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Don't you remember? I usually only get intoxicated when with you."

He sighed.

"If you're sure that's what you want."

I nodded again.

He lifted me off of his lap, effortlessly, and I groaned, flexing.

He smirked.

"Don't smirk at my humaness." I scolded.

"I am very sorry, human."

"You are very forgiven, vampire."

He smiled.

He lead me into the car, driving to the supermarket.

"Uh, Edward?" I asked before he started the car.

"Hm?"

"Could you drive me home? I have steak in the freezer, and I have to get changed..." I looked down at my shirt, which was covered in alot of melted chocolate.

"Yes, my dear, but would you like me to stay?"

I smiled.

"That's fine, Edward...but I really did want to eat my steak alone..."

He eyed me suspiciously.

"Alright, but I'm locking the sugar up as you get dressed."

"Deal."

He nodded, and I leaned my head against him as he drove.

"Ew." he muttered, shuddering.

"What? Should I take a shower, too? I didn't think my perfume smelled that bad..."

He chuckled.

"No, love. I smell the chocolate..." he shuddered again.

"Oh." I said, slightly embarrased.

He smiled when we arrived, and I slowly leaned out to get out.

I quickly got dressed into some old sweatpants and a sweater.

I walked out very slowly, and yet managed to trip over a piece of paper in the middle of the floor.

I picked it up.

It was from Edward.

_Bella, love,_

_There's a gift for you on the table. I know you might not accept it...but, this is because I will be on aim at home, and you can feel free to speak to me. Plus, Emmett wanted me to install his computer...I also bought you a steak knife. Please be careful. I'm begging you, love. Please! Enjoy your steak, and Instant Message me at: EdwardLovesBella19. Please. I'm already missing you. I love you. Have a good dinner, my little human. Come right over after dinner, if you would. I love you so much! _

_Love, Edward._

It's surprising how he left after writing this note.

It would've tooken me an hour if I wrote it.

So I went out to the table, and there was a dell laptop.

A new, blue one.

I went on aim, though.

And sure enough, Edward was on.

**Edwardlovesbella19: Bella, love! Yes! Have you made your steak? Is it good? I hear it comes from a cow. Oh, how I miss you! Has it been two minutes yet? Ugh, time moves so slow without you. I miss you! I love you! And I miss you, soooo much!**

Jeeze.

**Bellalovesedward18: Edward...calm down. I'm making my steak now...I love you too...but I'm not going to say it a hundred times. Sometimes, you're like my mother. Please, calm down. I'm fine. Thank you for the gift and everything. I miss you too? Be right back. I'm gonna make my steak.**

Worrie-wart.

**Edwardlovesbella19: Alright, love. Carefully, correct?**

**Bellalovesedward18: Correct, Edward. Be back when it's cooking.**

**Edwardlovesbella19: Have fun, Bella.**

Interesting conversation...

I put my steak in the oven, and sat down.

**Bellalovesedward18: Hey, it's cooking.**

**Edwardlovesbella19: Bella, I'm breaking up with you.**

Oh my god.

**Bellalovesedward18: Wha-wha-why? What? NO!**

**Edwardlovesbella19: Oh my! Bella, love! That was Emmett! Please believe me! I would never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever hurt you again! EVER!**

What a relief.

**Bellalovesedward18: Omigosh! Thank you so much!! Thank god! Okay, my steak's ready. I'll be back with my steak.**

**Edwardlovesbella19: No burning yourself.**

I rolled my eyes.

As I took the steak out, I didn't obey Edward.

I burnt myself.

I covered my hand in an icepack, and put my steak on a plate and got a fork.

**Bellalovesedward18: Hey, I'm back.**

**Edwardlovesbella19: And how are you and your steak?**

**Bellalovesedward18: The steak is good. Me...Well, I got a burn, but other than that, fantastic!**

**Edwardlovesbella19: OH BELLA! Are you sure you're fine? I could run you to the hospital...**

**Bellalovesedward18: NO! I'm fine Edward!! You gotta learn how to relax. I mean seriously. It's just a measly burn. Now I'm gonna eat my steak. Love ya.**

**Edwardlovesbella19: I love you too, Bella. Please, be careful with the knife.**

**Bellalovesedward18: Yeah, yeah, yeah.**

**Edwardlovesbella19: I'm serious. Bye, love.**

I signed off.

I grabbed the knife...carefully...and cut my steak.

I popped a piece in my mouth.

My eyes opened wide.

"My god this is great."

I kept eating until it was gone.

There were four more pieces in the freezer...

Maybe I could have some fun with my steak.

Even though Mom would say not to play with your food.

But I quickly made the perfect steaks and put all of them on the plate.

"Mmm!" I moaned.

I did tricks with it like balancing pieces on my nose and throwing them up in the air and catching them in my mouth, and hardly got any in, drawing smiley faces in the piece of steak, which came out in a birdish freddy kruger-ish shape though, and throwing a small piece of steak in the air, doing a cartwheel and catching it...I fell into the fridge.

Then, I took the big piece I had left and placed it on my hand.

The non-burnt one..

Then, since the steak was easy to cut through, I took the knife and started cutting through it.

It got hard in the middle, so I had to get passed that part.

I slammed the knife, trying to do it softly, through the steak.

"OW DAMN!" I yelled.

The knife have cut my wrist two times.

"BELLA!" I heard someone call from the front door.

A soft, frantic, velvet voice.

There was a river of tears falling from my eyes, and an ocean of blood from my wrist.

"EDWARD!" I cried from the pain.

He ran over and cuddled my and my wrist.

"Oh, Bella. I am so sorry. I'm going to go get a towel, and we'll take you to my house, and Carlisle will take a look at it. Alright?"

I nodded, and in a half second he was back with a towel.

He wrapped it around my wrist, and we headed out to his car...if he had brought one.

Thankfully, he had.

"Okay, Bella, would you like to ride up fron with me, or lay down in the back?" he asked, in a hurry.

I cried, and my arm stung.

"Up front!" I yelled, mostly from the pain.

I was in the front, his arm around my waist, in who knows what time.

We were speeding down the highway, and I didn't care.

He sat me in his lap while driving, which was against the law, but with me like this, he never cared about the law.

He kept stroking my hair and kissing my cheek, forehead, hair, and wrist.

He also kept whispering that it was going to be fine.

I nodded everytime.

When ever I felt pain, I would muffle my screams into his shoulder and cry.

"We're almost there, Bella. Hang on for me, please!"

We were finally there, and he ran me inside in inhuman speed.

I was in the kitchen with him and Carlisle.

The spoke to each other...vampire uses...and I was in a chair.

Edward held my hand, the burnt one...kissing the burn, and whispering sweet things to me.

It stung many times, and I bit my lip to hold them in.

Carlisle had put me into a clear bandage, and I was finished.

Of all the things that could happen while I ate steak, it had to be that.

Edward helped me stand up, since I was still dizzy.

Emmett came running in.

"Es--Ooo! Bella! Why did you go emo?"

Ugh.

I'm emo from eating steak.

What other analogies could there be for me?

Alot.

**REVIEW!! Please...?**


	4. Addicted to Pixy Stix

**Sorry I haven't updated in a while! Please review...I'll give you...a...M&M! Not! Haha! But please review. Your reward will be another chapter.**

"Edward...tell me again...why are we going to a candy store when nobody can eat it?"

He sighed, tightening his hand around mine.

"You...little missy...are going to look at everything without going crazy, and if you be good, I'll buy you something _small _afterwards."

Damn him.

Damn Edward to the deepist pits of hell.

My weakness.

"Fine." I huffed.

I breathed in and out near the lollipops, and chocolate.

I started hypervenalaiting near the sour powdered sugar, so I stepped out of the store for a moment.

I almost fainted when I saw an Omaha Steaks in the mall.

Edward came out slowly, and pulled me back in the candy store.

"You have been doing alright, so you deserve something small, love, alright?"

I nodded.

He had Emmett cover my eyes as he bought me something.

I felt Emmett's legs kick mine to make me walk.

"Meanie." I muttered to him.

He chuckled and kept kicking my legs, moving them forward.

I felt a whoosh of cool air, so I assumed we were outside.

The cold pair of hands fell away from my face, and Edward held out a bag, smiling.

I smiled back, and got into the volvo.

I peeked inside the bag, and saw five colourful sticks.

"Eeek!" I squealed. "Pixy Stix!"

"Bella, calm down." Edward tried to calm me.

But, sadly, I gulped them down, and ran out of the volvo before Edward could get in.

I heard him calling my name, but just kept running straight to the candy store.

I grabbed all the pixy stix my hands could touch, flew to the cash register, and threw over a few hundreds, and ran out, into Omaha Steaks.

I sat down at the tables, and gulped seven down at a time.

Edward, running at human pace, finally found me.

"Bella..." he warned.

I hissed at him like a mean cat.

He took a few steps closer.

"Bella, love? Put the candy down, please."

I hissed again, and ran.

Of course, he caught me, so I bit him.

He did nothing.

I tried acting as calm as I could.

"Edward, I am so sorry. I have to use the ladie's room."

He looked at me, but I kept my eyes down, and for a long time, he finally sighed.

He let go of me, and I ran back to the candy store.

Edward was right beside me.

"No." he said sternly.

"But..." I whimpered.

"No."

I sighed.

"Bella? Is it possible that you got addicted to pixy stix?"

I blushed, hesitated and nodded.

"Ah. It's going to be alright. I am going to take you to a therapist tommorow."

I nodded.

Why me?

**Sorry it was short...review please! The next chapter: The Therapist! Ha! Please. Please. Please. Review. I love reviews. They make me so happy. Even if they are bad. **


	5. The Therapist Part 1

**'Squeals' I get to write in Edward's point of view! Yayers! Anyway, review pleases!! It would make me feel fuzzy inside. Hahahaha! No, just happie! Thank you all of the reviewers! Anywhos, here we go!**

Edward's Point of View

Bella has a problem.

My Bella.

So many addictions, and what not.

First, she had gotten...loopy...on sugar, and then there was supposevly getting drunken for too much chocolate, and the steaks!

Oh Dear, Lord, the steaks!

And I wonder yet, how humans enjoy the taste.

Smelling it was horrid.

What they did to Bella...

Do I have problems?

I am saying they, instead of it or whatever.

And better yet, I'm thinking to myself too much.

Wow.

Maybe I need the therapist.

Pixy Stix.

Never again.

Ever.

So I'm taking Bella to the therapist today.

Right now, I am holding her in my cold arms, while she slept.

She spoke, just small amounts last night, which disppointed me.

I saw that her alarm clock was about to go off, but I shut it off.

I loved being her alarm clock.

I bent down and whispered, "Bella, love, we don't want to be late..."

She groaned and flopped down on her bed.

Or tried to.

I didn't let her go.

"Edward!" she whined.

I almost chuckled.

Just because she looked so much older, doesn't mean she didn't act like she was five.

I liked how she acted like that.

So different.

Unusual.

Beautiful.

Mine.

I cradled her in my arms, my hand swiftly brushing her pink rosed cheek.

I had an idea.

"Don't make me get Alice..." I murmured low in her ear, though it was a lie.

She shot up like a rocket.

I smiled at her.

"Good morning, my Beauty."

"Yeah, yeah, you too, Mr. Sexy."

My eyes went wide.

That was the first time she had called me that.

I had said she was sexy...once or twice.

"Well, soon you'll be Mrs Sexy, my sexy soon to be sexy wife."

I smelled her blood rush to her cheeks.

She turned around, pointing her finger to scold at me, but I was there in an instant, placing my lips onto hers.

When I pulled away, her breathing coming out as pants, Bella's finger slowly curled down.

I smiled her favorite smile, and heard her heart flutter.

"Go take a shower..." I hesitated for the effect. "Sexy."

She stuck her tounge out at me, turned, and went on her way.

I set up my "therapist".

**2 hours later.**

We were driving in the car, and Bella was singing along to some new song.

"Woooaaahh! That's what you get..." I tuned out the rest, trying to listen to my brother's thoughts.

_We're all ready. _He said.

I nodded to myself.

"Why are we at your house?" A curious Bella asked.

"You'll see..."

She gulped.

**I'm going to put up the next chapter today. So be patient, and if you feel like it, you can review.**


	6. The Therapist Part 2

**Last chapter...I think...Reviews?**

Mystery Point of View

I got up and opened the door to see Bella and Edward standing close together.

Why did Edward have to ring the doorbell?

This is his house...right?

Strange...

I had a fake mustache on and a tuxedo.

Why a tux?

Because...it's black...and white.

I get to look like a penguin!!

Yay!

"Hello, my patient." I said to Bella.

Edward rolled his eyes.

"Uh, Edward, why is--" I put my hand around her mouth, and forced her to walk.

"No talk, just walk." I said with a slight italian accent.

Edward, being Edward, pulled me away, growling.

"Right this way..." I sighed, guiding them to my office.

Edward and Bella looked around in the office.

"Sweet, huh?"

Bella nodded, and I sat her down on those therapist couches.

"Alright, Ms Swan...why are you obsessed with sugars and what not?" I asked randomly.

"Uh...because I am?"

I chuckled.

"Right, yes of course."

"Edward, can I have some root beer?" Bella asked.

"Um..." Edward stared at her blankly.

Bella's lip quivered, and she started crying.

Edward, being Edward, went to comfort her.

"There, there, love, I'll go out and buy you some."

She nodded like a three year oild getting her way.

Edward hissed at my comment.

Then he ran to the store.

Literally.

I turned back to Bella, just to notice she was gone.

I felt something warm and wet touch my shoulder...

"EWWWWWWW!!" I exclaimed.

Bella had licked me!

"Bella, what the hell??"

She shrugged.

"I've always wondered what a vampire tasted like..."

"Go find your loving vampire to lick...he may enjoy that..."

Bella just started licking my forehead.

"Stop." I murmured angirly.

I pushed Bella back onto the couch.

Edward came running back, handing her the soda.

She shoved it away, knocking it on the ground.

"Bella?"

"Can I lick Emmett again?" she asked giggiling all of a sudden.

Bella Point of View

Emmett tasted good.

I liked Emmett flavor.

After asking that, I licked Edward.

"EW!" he exclaimed.

I felt hurt.

I fell to the floor, whimpering.

I felt Edward lye beside me.

He carefully brought me back to the couch.

**4 hours later**

"And you're sure you can't be suffering from psycho disease?" Emmett asked again.

I rolled my eyes.

"Yes, I'm sure." I felt angry.

"I need a human moment." I had to pee.

Edward and Emmett nodded.

Emmett then burst out laughing.

"BELLA! Nice oil stain!"

I looked down at my pants.

Oh my.

The reason for all of this.

The answer to our mystery...

I had gotten my period.

Thank god for that...and not some psycho disease.

I ran away to get a tampon and new clothes.

ThE EnD...Or is it?? Nahh...I'll probably make a sequel.

**Review please. I'd appiciate it. Thank you so much to everyone who read this and enjoyed it! **


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